Looking back, we reflect on the television offerings of the past year, a selection of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their notable failures. From cringe-inducing sequels to bafflingly poor documentaries, here are the productions that had us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.
How to start with this divisive follow-up? Plagued with dreadful writing, painful arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series fought to find its footing. For a moment, as the third season began, it seemed as if it had finally found its groove. Then came an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the creator declared this would be the last series. It ended on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was simply too symbolic. Yet, viewers certainly found joy picking apart every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a small sob?
‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? The answer is a resounding no.’
But that was practically the smallest of this drama's issues. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon zero star assessment, it was difficult to know where to begin enumerating the flaws. The hilariously leaden dialogue? The tedious veneration of wealth and materialism? The almost wilful parade of tropes? Acting so poor they felt borderline spiteful? Let’s just say “all of the above” and never speak of this show again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.
Given the restraining orders, abuse allegations and fatherly shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not that you’d really have known it from this three-part docuseries which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless excess while failing to tell us a single thing we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any sympathy this series might induce should be saved for the people who have had to suffer proximity with this charismatic but flippant narcissist.
Of course we understood it was ridiculous from the outset: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One scarcely cared when his character died, and the other ended up slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.
Shady characters convening in empty boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.
Actually, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many look a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to indulge unconvincing accents. But there were many other problems. Mainly that it was just really dull; a dispute over drug-selling territory between various cockney picaresques which seemed rather simplistic.
Considering the extent to which she grinds the gears of certain performatively angry commentators, it’s almost easy to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s various ventures into quaint homemaking as intentional statements. But then you view them and are forced to admit that in this case, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue animated; a meme for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a parade of snoozing dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by immense, largely unearned wealth. Ugh.
There are clearly interesting things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, self-image, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this documentary series opted not to say them. Rather, the viewing was like reading a marketing brochure. She obviously has good reason to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But unfortunately, she didn’t do herself any favours with this cagey letdown of a series.
It had the potential to be the next cultural phenomenon – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a sharp-tongued personality managing her estate. What more could you ask for? As contestants competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to detail what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw glimpses of the star via filmed videos. The series ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to emulate something far greater than it.
How do you follow a show that captured a generation? The pressure was immense for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a shattered romance. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was a delight to watch, embodying Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of famous friends involved felt icky.
Not good enough to be ‘uneven’.
Given the shrewd inclusion of talented younger comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke milked to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, meanwhile, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.
This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely presented the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be treated sensitively. Rather, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right tone, lumbering from strangely jaunty, slightly mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A complete mess? Absolutely.
We love the star … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? No! This international thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – intellectuals frankly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.
This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for sexual escapades as she prepared for her most extreme feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was way more interrogation of her actual psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the legendary mum who showed up to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and absolutely no critical analysis of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the filmmaker has a teenage daughter too.
A tech journalist with over a decade of experience covering emerging technologies and digital innovation across Europe.
